STONECAT TRAIL MARATHON RACE REPORT

At the early hour of 4:45 AM Steve, Cindy, Kerry and I headed to Ipswich for the race.  We had absolutely no expectations or goals for this race except to have fun and preferably not get hurt.  We were pretty much all undertrained.  Kerry and I both struggled to get serious about training after the IM and Steve and Cindy had just done a marathon at the end of September.  We met Patty and Bonnie there.  Patty had done multiple races leading into this and Bonnie was the craziest of all of us as she signed up for the 50 miler instead of just the marathon.  We put on our team uniforms and headlights and were ready to hit the trails.


Let's get this party started

The race actually started late which in retrospect wasn't that bad because it meant less time running in the dark.  Considering the weather we had leading up to the race the course wasn't in too bad of shape.  Thick mud in some spots, tons of wet leaves down and covering rocks and roots and some puddles that you could pretty much run around.  It was cool to see all the runners standing around with headlamps on.


UMM..where do we go??

We weren't more than 2 miles into the race before I was laughing so hard I swallowed my gum and could barely run.  As was the case most of the day it was at Cindy's expense.  We LOVE you Cindy!!  Cindy is by far the most social of all of us.  That girl will talk to anyone.  Despite having 3 of her friends running with her she started chatting up a few strangers instead.  Shortly thereafter one of them pulled of the trail to stretch a muscle.  Then another jumped off to tie her shoe.  And then one more off to the side with a cramp.  HHMMMMM.  Now Cindy had no one to talk to and when she rejoined us Patty asked the million dollar question.  "What did you say to those people?"  They were dropping like flies!!!"  This of course had us all hysterically laughing and then Kerry and I decided Cindy was like a human battering ram and she could run ahead and just by talking to people clear us a path.  It wasn't long before Cindy struck again.  A lot of this race is singletrack.  For you non-runners that means there is only room for one person so if you are stuck behind a slower runner you need to go off the trail to pass which can be dangerous or they need to step aside for you.  At one point we were stuck behind a bunch of people who were going too slow for us and finally Patty had had it and made her move.  As a group we passed about 6 people or so and at one point Cindy said a bit too loud "only more more to get around" and I think the person was offended because she made a snotty remark as Kerry almost rolled down a cliff while passing her.  Whatever.  Our next laugh fest was a doozy.  I was a bit ahead of the group so I will tell you what I saw from my perspective.  I was at the bottom of a hill waiting for Cindy, Kerry and Patty when I heard hysterical laughing.  I looked up and saw Kerry on all fours on the ground and Cindy standing over her taking pictures.




There's NO crying in marathon running Kerry!!!!

Don't be alarmed.  Kerry wasn't really crying NOR did she fall.  She tripped and luckily for her Cindy was right in front of her which led to Kerry face planting right smack in the middle of Cindy's butt and then bouncing right back up as she and Cindy both remained upright.  Simply amazing.  Kerry then of course began laughing so hard she couldn't stay upright and that is how she ended up on the ground.  Nice catch with your ass Cindy.  I think we can all see that Cindy is a better friend since she offered up her ass as a cushion when we know from a prior blog that Kerry hightailed her ass away me in the same circumstances causing me to draw blood.  Just sayin!!!!  Steve was smart enough to stay away from us during the race but did say he could hear us laughing on several occasions.

Steve is really just trying to get away from us here!!!

  This was pretty much how the rest of the race went.  Lots and lots of laughing.  The aid stations for this race are amazing.  Besides your usual water and gatorade they had PB&J, eggs, bacon, pancakes, soup, cookies, potatoes, chips, pie, grilled cheese, M&M's.etc.  It is an all-out buffet.  Remember there are crazy people out there doing a 50 miler so they can be running for up to 12 hours.  They need food.


Loading up on chips and PB&J at the aid station

Kerry and I finished up the first loop and chatted with Deb as we waited for Cindy and Patty so we could all run the second loop together.


Patty and Cindy finishing up the first loop.

Notice Cindy's flowing hair in the picture.  She was obviously running blistering fast for that to happen.  Also notice Patty's perky bustline thanks to her hydration vest that doubled as a push-up bra!!!!  For those of you who don't know...Deb's husband Jim passed away suddenly and unexpectedly in September.  Not only was he Deb's husband but he was our friend. He is the originator of the Dead Horse Beach Athletic Club and designer of what might possibly be the ugliest, most uncomfortable running shirts I have ever owned!!!!  Jim loved this race and was signed up to do it so Deb decided to run one 12.5 mile loop for Jim and since Deb isn't all that fond of running and we love her dearly we decided we would do it with her.


DHABC doing it for Jim

Off we went and it wasn't long before the laughter began again.  Deb made a potty stop behind a tree except that there were people walking through the woods behind her that got a full moon sighting.  Apparently Cindy did this too at one point during the second loop also.  She squatted behind a tree and yelled "Don't look" to the group which of course made every one of them look her way only to see her head behind a tree but her butt half-way out on the trail.  Oh the joys of running in the woods.


Everyone wanted to take our picture

As you can tell by all the pictures there was a whole lot of stopping during this race.  After hitting the aid station around Mile 17ish my toe was really starting to bother me and the longer I was out there the worse it got so I had to make a decision to go ahead of the girls.  I didn't want to but I wanted the pain to stop so I needed to be done.  I ran the last 8 something miles alone.  I am going have to breakdown and get the damn thing operated on soon I guess.  Anyhow....we all finished eventually and got some sweet sweatshirts with the following logo


Love this sweatshirt

An awesome race on an awesome day with awesome company.  Couldn't ask for anything else. Well..it would have been nice to have Bonnie's company but since she started earlier with the 50 milers we didn't see her too much.  Despite spending half the day together for the race we met at Cindy's that night for wine, beer and food.  The laughter kept on coming and one discussion led to our next race which we will also need to develop as it hasn't been done before.  We were torturing Cindy (again I know) about her making her kids ride their Big Wheels for miles and miles when they were little which led to Patty saying she never had one.  What?!!!!!  So we told her partner Jim to buy her one for Christmas which led him to say "Oh no...she'll find a race somewhere that uses them and then I'll have to go"  This led to the idea of the First Annual Big Wheel 50 Miler.  Adults only.  So after Christmas I will begin training.  Look out peeps I am pimping out my Big Wheel!!

THE BAHAMAS

At 2AM this morning Quinn and I finally got home after 5 great days in the Bahamas.  It was a relaxing, fun trip and I have the tan and a few extra pounds to prove it.  After a ridiculously aggravating week at work I simply could not wait to get the hell out of here.  I knew however that I had one last hurdle before I could relax.......flying.  Now don't get me wrong, I like to fly.  The problem is that they don't require an IQ test to fly so I knew the airports will be FULL of idiots who have forgotten how to read or follow directions.  The general public did not disappoint.  There was the women holding up the line to board the plane while looking for her boarding pass.  WTF.  It's not like she didn't have over an hour to get it readily available.  There were those who park themselves in the aisle while arranging their gazillion carry-ons and coats etc while others are trying to get to their seats.  Let's not forgot those who are clearly far too important to turn off their electronic devices when asked and continue to yak on the phone, send emails or update their Facebook status until the flight attendants threaten to take their device away.  Here is what I think their Facebook status should say.......Acting like a complete ass on Jet Blue while person next to me tries to NOT choke the life out of me.  UGH.  And wait there's one more....the father of the family of 5 who despite being given the customs forms at the beginning of the 2hr 45min flight decided to wait to fill all of them out until he was actually in the line to go through customs.  IDIOTS.  Finally we cleared customs, got the shuttle to the hotel and parked ourselves here


AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The next 5 days went like this...sleep, eat, drink, lay at pool, eat, drink, lay at pool, shower, eat, drink, sleep REPEAT.  We spent a lot of time marveling at the way people dress.  I would under NO circumstances EVER wear a bikini because I know no one needs to see that.  I think you should have to be certified to wear a bikini because honestly there were people there who easily had 100 lbs on me sporting them.  I didn't even know they made them that big.  I don't give two craps how big you are but for the love of God please dress appropriately.  And guys.....if you look down and you can't see your feet because your stomach is in the way then please step away from the Speedo!!!!!!!!!  We have a habit of naming people on vacation also.  Rosario was there..the maid from Will and Grace.  The woman looked just like her.  Dudley Do Right was there also


Remember him????

Now the dude didn't actually look like him much BUT he was Canadian ehh and never shut up the entire time he was there.  I almost jumped in the pool to drown him at one point as he was yapping about our country and how screwed up it is etc.  Really Dudley???  Shut the F up and go back to your own damn country.  There was also Trailer Trash Chick who I never saw once without a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other.  Perhaps the most amusing yet painful thing that happened all week was at my expense.  For whatever reason there were lots of bees around and as I went to sit up on my beach chair unbenownst to me I sat on one.  The bee took issue with that and stung me soo far up my inner thigh that I really think the damn thing should have at least bought me dinner first!!!!!  I think maybe in some foreign countries we might be married after that encounter.

Mom meet your new son-in-law

Holy crap did that hurt!!!!  The following day the pain was replaced by incessant itching which led me to utter "Why couldn't I get bit somewhere where I could scratch and not look like a creep?!!!"  It looks a bit better finally but man that was not fun.



Now THAT left a mark

I did manage to do something somewhat strenuous while there and climbed the rockwall.  It seemed to be a lot harder than I remember from six years ago.



Does this harnass make my ass look big?  Umm yeah.

The weather was pretty good all week.  Mid to upper 70's but very windy.  This was pretty much as close as Quinn got to the water all week because it was rough.



You got sand where???

It actually got a bit chilly in the afternoon when the wind picked up and the sun dropped behind the buildings.  This is what I had to resort to





No I'm not cold. What gave you that idea???

All in all a great vacation and we brought a little bit of our friend Jim to the Bahamas with us



Dead Horse Beach Athletic Club hits the Bahamas

Despite spending five days with low blood pressure and no stress it took me all of 10 mins after hitting the airport for the trip home before I wanted to smack some sense into someone.  Check in...good...Bahamas immigration..good.  When you travel out of the Bahamas you actually go through US Customs there as opposed to when you land in the states.  This can be good since it saves that whole get your bag, go through customs, recheck bag and go through security nonsense BUT this time it didn't work out so great.  We spent about an hour in line for US Customs and had to deal with all the dumb annoying people and one chick in particular who spent the whole time lamenting the fact that she and her snooty friends didn't use the private jet this time.  It would have saved so much time.  Really Barbie?!!!!  Get over yourself.  Oh well...back to reality peeps.

I AM OUTTA HERE

So Saturday I was here

 

Ready to go

Here is the Stonecat Trail Marathon.  We do look like total dorks but in our defense the race started in the dark so we needed headlamps.  It was wet, muddy, slippery and a complete and total blast.  I have never laughed so hard while attempting to run a marathon in my life.  I have many details to share about the race BUT I don't have time right now because tomorrow at 6AM I will be on a plane to here


 

This is where you recover from a marathon

If all goes well I should be drunk by 2PM and sunburn by 4.  See you in a week peeps!!!!

UMM..YOU CUT YOURSELF HOW?????

What up blog peeps?  So in my half-ass attempt to get in some kind of worthwhile training for my marathon in 13 freakin days I have been running 4 days a week.  This is unusual for me as I have been a 3 day a week runner for years now.  I am trying to get that 4th run in during the early am hours because honestly work sucks the life right out of me and I have issues with getting out there to run after work.  So instead of putting on my big girl panties and dealing with it I prefer to run at o dark thirty.  I headed out Thurs and was having a great run in the wonderful 45 degree dry air until mile 4.5 when I tripped over ......well who the hell knows what I tripped over...my feet, a rock, the sidewalk, a piece of dust , air...whatever.  I executed a stunning slide and once again managed to scrape up my knees.  My hands were ok since I had gloves on.  So for the umteenth time I finished out a run (2.5 miles) with blood running down some extremity.  The only redemming part about this wipeout was that since it was dark and 5:15 AM no one saw me do it!!!  That however was NOT the most amazing blood-letting incident of my week.  That came yesterday morning at Mile 11.75 of a 12 mile run as I arrived at a blind corner of a driveway at the same time a guy WALKING a bike with a 10 foot rusty pole balanced on it was exiting said driveway.  He had no idea I was coming and I had no idea he was coming until this very large pole all of the sudden appeared in front of me.  I had all of 1 sec to reach my hands up to prevent me from decapitating myself on the damn thing.  By doing that I managed to slice open my hand on the rusty pole.  After a series of OMG's and sorry's I reassured the guy I would be ok and I finished yet another run with blood dripping down an extremity. 

If this guy had a metal pole and was walking the bike it would be my guy!!!!

Seriously peeps.....who the hell gets sliced open buy a killer rusty pole???!!!!!WTF.  Quinn just shook her head when I told her what happened and pointed to the hutch which houses the first aid bag of wound care products, gauze, bandages, tape, etc.  Man that thing gets a lot of use. Today I ran a 9.3 mile race in the woods and on some very technical trails and did not wipeout at all.  Kerry and I did get lost and added a little under a half mile to our race.  Cindy and Deb ran..they got lost.  Steve ran..he got lost.  All at different places though.  Go figure.

On a non-running note.  Tray and Ariel came over after Ariel's guitar lesson yesterday so we could walk downtown get some lunch and freak watch.  It probably would have been easier to order a pizza and sit on my couch and watch those two instead.  After a dreary, rainy, foggy, cloudy morning it turned into a beautiful 70 degree day.  Well...unless you are a member of the Dudevoir mushroom family.  They frown upon bright sunshine.  If you go to their house on a bright summer day every window, door and blind will be closed and every air conditioner and fan in the house will be on.  You will need a headlamp to find your way around the house in the dark. FREAKS!!!!!! We walked into town to a chorus of "I'm hot, why did the sun have to come out, omg I am sweating".  Most people would consider yesterday beautiful but those Dudevoir's suffer from combustitis...the fear of spontaneously combusting when exposed to sunlight.

Now THAT will leave a mark

Despite the pissing, moaning, whining, complaining and worrying about melting we had a nice lunch and saw some typical Halloween in Salem freaks.  16 days till the BAHAMAS!!!

7 MONTHS IN 6 MINUTES

After the Ironman I spent umpteen hours putting together a slide show that summed up the experience.  It was a colassal pain in the ass to do but it came out great and I burned it onto a few DVD's to send to the family.  Unfortunately for whatever reason the DVD does not play in anyone's DVD player but it does play on the computer if you have a DVD player installed.  What freakin ever.  That crap is way outside of my realm of know how so I decided to upload it here for your viewing pleasure.  Hope you like it. The quality of the pictures isn't anywhere near as good as the real thing but until I get home to PA in December it is the best youns will get!!!  I take that back.  I tested the link and when it comes up there is a little thing that looks like a gear with a HD next to it.  Click on that and make sure it is on 1080.  That will make the video crystal clear.  Love you all.  For my not so computer saavy peeps the video has music and you can view it full screen.  That button looks like a picture frame doo hickey thingamabob.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4_Tjmj2f1Y&feature=youtu.be

A NEW TRADITION

After many many years of being parade watchers it has become apparent that Ariel and I will now become permanent parade crashers.  We had an absolute blast Thursday night and all of you blog peeps will be happy to know that we did not throw one piece of candy towards anyone's head.  In fact...brace yourself....we had so much fun no one even got on our nerves.  UMM WHAT???!!!!  Yep it's true.  First off let's talk about the costumes.  Once again Quinn outdid herself and with $20 of material and 45 minutes made us look like this.


I like your taste in clothing!!!!

Pretty cool huh?!  I would expect nothing less from someone who looks like this

Clearly she looks brilliant

Thankfully the rain ended around 5 Thursday and we headed downtown for dinner.  After eating my weight in chips, salsa and a burrito we went back to the car and Quinn dressed us.  We weren't 200 feet from the car when a young college kid and his girlfriend stopped and asked to take a picture with us.  Since we looked like penguins we decided we should walk like them

We stopped at our usual parade viewing spot and waited for Kerry and the penguins from the Carlton School to come by.  They were towards the beginning of the parade so we were in the parade in no time.  We marched along handing out candy and waving to the crowds.  We marched the whole way to the end at the Salem Common and got kudos from the assistant principal and a kindergarden teacher at the school.  Nothing liked getting thanked for crashing a parade.  A women at the Common asked to video us and a guy from England asked to take our picture to show to his "mates" back home.  As usual Ariel and I spent the whole night cracking each other up with our warped sense of humor.  As the bagpipers went by I declared "I love men in skirts".  When the cop on the segway went by she looked at me and said "Paul Blart..mall cop".  Some other random things we said or were said to us in my favorite run-on sentence style of writing are ...Hoooooooo. He is totally rocking that dress. Attention attention we have two penguins busting a move at the common. Don't worry I just removed a layer of skin. Are you two related?.  What a fun night so looks like it is a go from now on.  More candy next year and new costumes.  Not going to commit to not pelting someone with candy though.  It is bound to happen eventually.  For me Thursday was simply awesome.  After work I talked to my nephew Josh for 25 minutes on the phone and then spent the next few hours with Ariel.  Those two mean the world to me.
I am by the way still working out despite not blogging about it much.  I am sort of kind of training for my marathon in November.  I am running 4 days a week and over 30 miles a week but don't really have the long runs in that I should.  Oh well.  On Saturday Kerry, Patty, Cindy, Bonnie, Steve and I did a run on the marathon course.  It is a 12.5 mile loop and I did 4 miles before.  Overall I felt ok and managed to not face plant.  There were two parts of the course that had puddles you simply had to run through.  Nothing like submerging your feet in ankle deep water 4 miles into a run.  That is the fun of trail running though and it didn't bother me one bit.  The race is all about fun so I am not getting worked up about it.  I miss my bike believe it or not.  The weekend weather hasn't really been cooperating so my biking outside has been minimal.  As far as swimming goes.......still hate it and it is even harder now to go because I don't really have to.  Who cares.  I still manage to get there twice a week..usually. BTW only 30 days till vacation.  BAHAMAS baby!!!  That is how you recover from a marathon.  Sun, sand and frozen beverages.

DOOBY DOOBY DO

BEWARE THE PENGUIN......anyone remember that Bud Light commercial?  If not you can watch it here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVWtq-_VYk8.  Ok but why am I bringing it up you ask.  Well every year since she was knee high, on the first Thursday night in October I have been bringing Ariel to the Salem Halloween parade.  We go to dinner with Quinn and her friend and then they leave us to head to the first of many bars while Ariel and I find a spot to plop down and watch the lamest Halloween parade ever in the Halloween Capital of the World.  There is a theme every year for this parade but it seems like everyone does their own thing and people just pop in anywhere along the way and join.  We simply love this parade and decided last year we were going to crash it and join the fun this year.  The theme for 2012 is animals and when I told Kerry we were going to crash the parade she said Jack's school was dressing up like penguins.  Perfect.  Easy costume to put together and you are all aware of my affinity for the Penguins of Madagascar.  Just for the record...Kerry told me about this while we were out riding bikes and oh yeah...it was raining.  WTF!!  No it wasn't supposed to.  Whatever.  Apparently Mother Nature still has issues with us. But I digress.  So Ariel, Quinn and I hit the craft store for costume supplies yesterday and then loaded up on candy.  We don't think anywhere near enough people throw candy during the parade so we are going to do our part.  Of course I needed Quinn for the craft store part because that kind of stuff isn't my forte...oh crap Tray...I just remembered we forgot your craft sticks...oops.  Anyhow if you put me and a glue gun and glitter and scissors together in one room something bad is bound to happen and I will be permantly glued to some inanimate object although I will be really sparkly.  So next weekend we will make our costumes for the Oct 4th parade.  For those of you who don't live in these parts, Halloween is a month long celebration in Salem so the parade is early and kicks off the madness.  By the time the last two weekends of October roll around I don't even attempt to take my car anywhere.  Sheer madness.  After the costumes are made there is one final detail to work out.  Apparently certain members of my family are a bit concerned about the throwing candy part.  They are afraid that my anger management issues could possible result in me bouncing a roll of Smarties off someone's head at warp speed.  Ariel doesn't really tolerate the general public's stupidity all that well either so the two of us together might just be problematic.  But hey...here's a thought....if you get beamed off the head by a Tootsie Roll or a piece of Super Bubble.......A.  For whatever reason you clearly had it coming, B. You did, said or thought about saying something that annoyed us C. You stole candy from someone younger than you or D. We just totally felt like clocking you upside the head with a piece of candy.  Stay tuned for the parade recap in a few weeks and remember........BEWARE THE PENGUINS!!

UMM YEAH....THAT'S GONNA LEAVE A MARK

Hello my blog-following peeps... big news on the blog front.  Despite bonding all summer over Ironman training, spending umpteem hours together sweating and enduring grueling conditions and accomplishing together the biggest challenge we have ever undertaken, I have finally found Kerry's threshhold for our friendship.  She simply refused to allow me to use her ass to cushion my fall while running yesterday.  Sad I know.....I was a bit choked up myself. Anyhow this is how it all came about.  Cindy, Kerry and I went to Lynn Woods yesterday to get in a two hour run.  Now I love running in the woods but the one bad thing about it is when you get tired running you start dragging your feet a bit.  This isn't so bad on the roads but the kiss of death in the woods where the trails are full of rocks and tree branches.  About an hr and 25 mins in I was dragging ass and my feet when boom.....my foot hit a rock and I started that slow motion "oh crap I am going down" dance.  There was pretty much nothing I could do to stop it.  Now Kerry was running in front of me and upon hearing that unmistakeable sound of someone hitting a rock and then the cascade of dragging feet she said and I quote "I felt something coming and I wasn't sure exactly what it was but I knew I didn't want to get caught in it so I took off."  So there you have it peeps.  I could have landed softly on Kerry's ass but instead hit the ground and executed a stunning slide depositing tons of dirt and gravel into both hands.  Whatever Kerry!!!!  Seriously though thank God she sped off because given the fact that I easily have 20+ lbs on her I would have taken her down like a bowling ball meeting a bowling pin.  Once I got back on my feet we surveyed the damage.  Both palms were bloody and both knees were already sprouting bruises.  Kerry squirted water from her bottle onto my hands to try and wash away some dirt and gravel from the cuts.  Cindy offered up the back of her shorts for me to wipe the blood off but I used my own shorts instead.  She kept pointing to her ass saying "right here" "right here".  Now I knew what she was talking about but Kerry thought she was asking her to squirt water there and could not figure out why the hell Cindy wanted her ass squirted with water.  What a crew we are.  Like any self-respecting runner I walked a few minutes to make sure everything worked and nothing I needed for running hurt and said "Let's go finish this run!"  And so off I went dripping blood for 35 more minutes.  When I got home I had Quinn help me clean up the wounds as much as I could tolerate without crying like a girl.  OMG that hurt. Once again Quinn had to break out multiple first-aid products to put me back together again.  Talk about high maintenance!!! They look pretty good today but my hands are very sore.  Unfortunately you can't appreciate the bruising in the pictures.

In retrospect it could have been worse........this could have happened



Now that would really leave a mark!!!!

I think that might truly be the last straw for my friends.  I have traumatized them enough without breaking out my pasty white ass for them to see!!!!  Cindy, Kerry and I reunited this morning for a bike ride and spent an enjoyable 40 some miles together.  It rained but we kept on riding.  It was like wild kingdom out there. I am pretty sure the animals are planning a takeover because they were in groups today...4 deer, 6 turkeys, a gaggle of geese (no kidding...there were at least 50 of them), 3 horses and squirrels galore.  I did see a few horses asses also but they were in cars trying to see how close they could come to me on the bike.  Idiots. Just how many geese do you need to qualify for a gaggle anyhow?  Anyone out there know?  Anyhow..other notable weekend stuff..went out to dinner last night with Tracie, Ariel and Quinn and had an awesome time.  The only drawback was the little shit sitting at the table behind us who felt the need to scream frequently throughout dinner at the top of his lungs in an ear-piercing tone pissing off just about the entire restaurant.  Now I would never harm a child but I truly wanted to choke the life out of this kids parents.  Idiots.  One more note before I sign-off...a special shout out to Mef (my Aunt Beth for non-family readers) who is in the hospital after a set-back from her hip surgery.  Keep strong Mef and be positive.  I love you!!!!

BUSY BUSY BUSY

For someone who doesn't exactly have a booming social life I had a very busy weekend.  Quinn and I decided to play tourist on Saturday and went into Boston to see the Constitution.  We walked from North Station over to the Charlestown Navy Yard and waited in line to see the boat.  This was right up there with trying to get on a plane.  Belts, cellphones, camera, etc and body all through metal detector and xray.  Thankfully it took much less time and we were on the boat.  If you live in these parts and have never seen it you really should go.  It is a beautiful ship full of history and it's FREE!!!  I found something I really wanted to take off the boat but but it was a bit big to carry.  I can assure you if I had one of these

I have a million reasons for needing one of these

those lawn-mowing idiots from next door would manage to get it done much quicker!!!  Nothing like a canonball across your lawnmower/weedwacker/leafblower to get your ass moving.  And yes that is an Ironman finisher shirt I have on.  Have I mentioned I am an Ironman??  After touring around the Constitution we visited the USS Caisson Young which is a destroyer.  Quinn found a little something there she wanted to take home.  This might just shutup the white trash f bomb dropping neighbors on the other


Depth charge anyone?

side of our apartment who scream at each other at least three times a day or more.  IDIOTS.  We left the Navy Yard peacefully without procuring any weapons and walked over to the North End into the madness of St. Anthony's feast.  After splitting a softball-sized aranchini we sat over by the fountains and cooled our feet.  It was a great day.  Sunday was raceday.  Kerry and I were doing the Cranberry Olympic Tri.  We were both signed up to do this last year but some beyotch named Hurricane Irene blew threw causing the race to be cancelled.  The weather yesterday was beautiful although heavy fog caused the race start to be delayed 15 mins because you could not see the buoys on the pond.  It was great to

As Quinn says...same picture, different numbers



 do a race with absolutely no pressure.  As stated I had one goal and that was to ride the wheels off my bike and I did.  That must have been Kerry's goal too because she had a blistering fast ride also.  We both averaged just under 19MPH.  We both agreed that our legs were burning and hurting but we didn't care.  Kerry followed that up with a damn good run and I thought mine was pretty good considering I have a toe that hurts like a bastard and can only be fixed with surgery.  Both of our swims were good.  We started in different waves.  I was in the 45 and up wave since I am old.  These women were brutal.  Worse than Lake Placid.  I got hit, pushed and swum over more than in the IM.  Nasty old biddies!!!  Kerry said her wave was very aggressive also.  The water was pretty shallow in some parts but all in all a nice swim.  It took me a few minutes longer in transition than planned since my damn wetsuit got stuck on my foot.  I think every race should have wetsuit strippers!!!  Great day, great race.  After I crossed the finish line I heard someone calling my name.  I looked up but didn't recognize said person but she was carrying flowers so she can't be too bad right?!  Turns out it was Melanie, loyal blog reader and Kerry's friend who came to watch us.  She had flowers for both of us which was awesome of her.  Thank you Melanie and good to finally meet you!!  Thanks to all of Kerry's friends for coming out to watch and cheer us on.  Thanks again to Quinn, sherpa extraordinaire who not only comes to these races but makes sure she sees us as many times as possible.  You rock Lynda.  Onto marathon training.


Me and Kerry on our way to check out the water



Asking Quinn if my legs are still attached



Bonnie did this race after doing a marathon in ICELAND a week ago!!!!!



A DAY TO GIVE THANKS

No you have not missed a few months...it is not Thanksgiving.  I think everyone has days that are special to them for whatever reason....birthdays, anniversaries etc.  I know that ever since losing all that weight years ago I have made it a point to do some type of workout on my birthday every year since 2002.  This year I really whooped it up by riding my bike 85 miles thanks to Ironman training.  So what is so special about August 20th...besides the fact that it is my Ironbuddy Kerry's birthday?  HAPPY  BIRTHDAY KERRY!!!!!!  One year ago today on August 20, 2011 is when I crashed my bike and injured my brain and a few other parts of me.  So very much has happened in the past year.  I have to admit I still get very unnerved thinking about that day and I know those of you who were there and have full recall of that day will also never forget it. There is actually not a day that goes by that I don't think about that day mostly due to a few scars that I see every day when I look in the mirror and one on the back of my hand.  But today I choose to be positive about August 20th because the outcome could have been far different and despite taking a full three months to recover from that dreadful day I did and I am fine.  I have decided that from now on every August 20th I will swim bike and run.  Not any crazy distances..just a little of each.  I wasn't sure I would ever do any of those things again so I will celebrate my ability to do so.  I will also spend the day thinking of everything I have to be thankful for.  Again it is only by the grace of God that I am here and I am so lucky to have a wonderful family, friends and my health.  Those are the things that really matter in life.  So my blog peeps I invite you to give thanks today for whatever you choose and be happy today for what you have and not what you wish you had.
ADDENDUM:  WTF..WTF...WTF...WTF!!!!  About 5 seconds after I posted this freakin blog I started hysterically crying.  Where in the hell did that come from?  I was seriously at peace and in a good place when I wrote the damn thing and then BAM..I get blind-sided with all this emotional crap.  The worst part was that I couldn't get over this feeling of being very restless and needing to go do something with myself.  Thankfully being a Monday it was my paperwork day at work so if I left I wouldn't be short-staffing the floor. I attempted to go talk to my supervisor about leaving no less than 4 times but while I was trying to figure out what to say I would start crying again.  Since I only cry in front of people under dire circumstances I turned around and went right back to my office.  I tried to get some work done and take my mind off of it but that wasn't working so I finally had to ask to leave in an email.  Since I have an awesome supervisor she understood and was ok with it.  I am home now and a bit better but still shocked at the effect this had on me.  I wanted this to be nothing but a thankful, positive day but I guess I am not quite there yet.  You know of course this pisses me off to no end.  I am still thankful for everything I have and have accomplished two of my three workout goals for the day.  Swim and run done.  Bike up next.  To me going out for a ride a year to the day you crashed on the same bike is like giving the incident the finger and if you know anything about me you know I am a fan of giving things the finger!!!!!!

TESTING TESTING 1, 2, 3

Ok loyal blog followers......time to discuss the future of this blog.  First however,  let's talk about what I have been up to since IMLP and what the future holds.  My recovery has been good.  I am still surprised at how little pain I had in the days following the race...relatively speaking of course.  My back was the worst and felt like it was going to snap in half at any moment.  I did have to walk down the stairs sideways for a day or two after the race but honestly I have felt worse after just running a marathon.  Weds after the race I went out for a 45 min bike ride.  Friday I went for a 4.5 mile run and Saturday I went for a 34 mile bike ride.  Shortly after uploading that workout I got an email from Jeff essentially asking "What the hell is wrong wrong with you???? You need to rest and recover.  You need to understand that although you feel "okay" your body is dealing with a very deep-seated fatigue leaving you vulnerable to sickness and injury!!!"  Umm OOPS.  My bad.  So I listened and rested and didn't run for the next week and stuck to swimming.  He actually wrote in my training plan to go for a walk to the ice cream shop...like 5 days in a row.  Good thing I am really not a big ice cream fan or I would have gained 10 lbs that week.  So finally after 3 weeks I am getting back into a structured training schedule again.  In 2 weeks Kerry and I are doing an Olympic distance tri which consists of a .9 mi swim, 26 mi bike and 6.2 mi run.  I have no expectations or stress over this race and only one goal....I am going to ride my bike like I stole it....as fast as I can and I hope the tires are smoking when I get back into transition.  I haven't been able to do that all summer.  Of course it will make for a painful run but hey..I am an Ironman...I can take it.  After that I will transition into trail running because I am doing a trail marathon in November.  Again no pressure here...just a leisurely 26.2 miles in the woods.  Whatever happens happens.

Onto the blog....I am still not convinced my life is entertaining enough to keep it going so here is a preview of what to expect.  I will be forced to blog about sheer randomness starting with the IDIOTS who mow my neighbor's lawn.  While I really like the little old lady who lives next door I could do without her son and grandson who come to mow the lawn.  First off the lawn is the size of a postage stamp and I could cut it with a pair of scissors in half the time it takes these two IDIOTS to get it done. They pull up with their big boy power tools.....mower, weedwacker, leaf blower.  Really dudes. I am sure this is their next purchase.



Another big boy toy

Grandson gets started on the mower.  Of course it takes him 25 pulls of the cord to get it started and I am surprised he doesn't dislocate his shoulder in the process.  In the meantime Son has fired up the weedwacker to trim around the fence and judging by the excruciately high-pitched metal sound I hear the most he is using it as a paint stripper for the fence posts also.  It seems that Son takes issue with the way Grandson is cutting the lawn so he proceeds to yell at him over top of both machines adding to the symphony outside my window.  After what feels like an eternity they finally shut off the mower/weedwacker/paint stripper and there is beautiful silence and I can once again hear the television and myself think.  That lasts for 3 secs as they fire up the leaf blower to .....well honestly I have no freakin idea why they use the damn thing.  IDIOTS.  By the time they finally pack up their toys and leave I could strangle them with my bare hands.  I think from now on when they pull up I am going to have to jump in my car and go for a ride for an hour to get away from the noise. 

SO followers...I can't do this alone.  If you want me to continue you must comment.  I mean why bother with all this typing if I don't know anyone is reading!!!!  Let's see how it goes.  The ball is in your court.

FINAL IRONMAN LAKE PLACID THOUGHTS

Now don't think for one minute just because this blog title has the word final in it that I will never talk about the race again.....if I continue blogging.  We'll discuss that in the next post.  I mean let's face it I get bragging rights forever.  Speaking of forever...a mere 7 days and 4 hours after beginning my quest I FINALLY got my tattoo!!!!

I will spare you the long version of my third attempt Thursday that fell through because the tattoo artist went to his other job where he bakes cakes.  WTF!!!  I thought maybe I was on Candid Camera.  Anyhow. I will probably find a way to work the fact that I am an Ironman into a plethora of conversations.  "Congratulations on your engagement.   You should honeymoon in Lake Placid where I became an Ironman"  "Sorry you lost your job.  With your free time let's get coffee and talk about my Ironman race."  "Wow your broken leg looks painful.  So glad that didn't happen to me during my Ironman race" and so on and so on.  I have a few more random thoughts to share about the race.  Of the over 2700 people registered for the race only 25% were female.  The average age of an Ironman is 37 and 95% have a post-secondary education.  I am sure that is because you need a good job to pay for all the insanity that accompanies this endeavor.  If you count my bike purchase 2 years ago in preparation for eventually signing up for this race I spent over $10,000 between bike, coaching, lodging, registration, gear, clothes etc.  I lost two important items during race week.  The cross I wore on my necklace got caught in my wetsuit during a practice swim and got ripped off the chain.  During the race I wore my watch for the swim then took it off in transition to put on my Garmin.  I never saw the watch again.  Kind of ironic to loose an Ironman watch doing an Ironman.  I have replaced that because I hate being without a watch but the cross will have to wait until my bank account heals a bit.  I can't believe how calm I felt as Kerry and I floated in Mirror Lake waiting for the cannon to go off.  Despite how hard the race was I never NOT ONCE thought about or wanted to quit.  I truly enjoyed race day and all my smiles were real.  I was thankful to have the ability to do it. As stated my main goal was always to finish but I told a very select few people that I thought I could do it in around 15 hours.  I am amazed at how spot-on I was.  I procured 7 cowbells for my cheering squad yet I have none now.  What did you people do with them???  Kerry, Dan, Quinn and I went out while we were still in Lake Placid to celebrate and talk about our races.

Beers and margaritas all around

Kerry and I were both surprised at how so many people said they were amazed at what we did, called us their idols and heroes.  We decided that we don't have any superpowers unless you count dedication and perserverance as a superpower.  We were simply two people who had a dream and a goal and decided we were going to do whatever it took to make it a reality.  So this is my challenge to you my loyal blog followers.  Life is short and that has been proven to me several times the past year.  I want you all to go after what you want.  Whatever it is.  Big or small.  Make a plan and stick with it.  Keep the faith through the hard times and enjoy the good.  You will get what you want and if for some reason you don't......dust yourself off, wipe away your tears and try again.  And with that I will leave you with a few more photos.

LOVE this pic of me and Kerry...like lambs off to the slaughter

I look totally badass on my bike

This is when I looked at the clock and saw my time

I am an Ironman

HARDER THAN AN IRONMAN?!??!!!

It took me all of 7 days to find something harder than completing an Ironman.  Getting an Ironman tattoo!!!!  Oh yeah...and it takes longer too.  Whereas it only took me 14:54:27 to do the race I have been trying to get a freakin tattoo for almost 30 hours now.  While the rest of the businesses in the country are struggling that doesn't seem to be the case for tattoo parlors.  Well at least the two I have gone to this weekend.  I visited the first with Kerry yesterday at noon.  Why noon you say?  Well that is what time they open and since they don't make appointments over the phone we had to go there and hope to get done as a walkin or make an appointment.  While this establishment opened the door at noon apparently the tattoo artists start whenever they feel like it.  The girl at the desk said they "should" be here shortly.  We went back around 12:45 and one of the two artists had shown up but had an appointment at 1.  I had a massage scheduled at 2 so I made an appointment to come back at 4 to have mine done.  I chatted with the artist and gave her a deposit and left Kerry there to wait for the other artist.  I returned at 4 and the artist was "finishing" up another client.  She then said she just had to clean up real quick and we would get started.  Now if you know me you know I am already pissed off.  I am Type A on time, responsible, times a wasting kind of person.  At 4:35 she said she was just going to smoke a quick cigarette and we would start.  I gritted my teeth together so hard I thought I would bust a molar and said fine.  Who wants someone in the middle of a nicotine fit taking a needle to their ankle?  In the time it would take me to run over a mile she was still smoking and talking to some random guy on the sidewalk.  That's it... I was done.  I walked out and said "Give me my money back I have more important things to do with my time" She said "I am done I am ready"  I said "I don't give a shit give me my money".  And I walked away.  Really??????????????????  Give me an f'n break.  Customer service???  Professionalism???? Apparently the Purple Scorpion in Salem, MA is rolling in the dough and doesn't need your business so don't bother going there.  New plan...Sunday afternoon I go to a place where Tracie went for a tattoo.  Place opens at noon.  I go around 12:30. Place is open but no tattoo artist.  He should be in around two or 3.  WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  She tried to call someone in but no luck so she took my name and number and said they would call when they got in and I could come down.  Yeah right.  Apparently the Shining Star in Peabody, MA is also rolling in the dough because they just called me back right now at 5:40.  I don't know what the message says nor do I have any intention of listening to it because I sure as hell ain't going back there either.  So here I sit after 30 hours and two attempts with no tattoo.  I am going to New Hampshire next weekend to the place that did my first tattoo.  It shouldn't be this hard!!!  I think these two businesses should change there business hour signs to this
HOURS
EVERYDAY 12-9
UNLESS WE DON'T OPEN ON TIME.
TATTOO ARTISTS AVAILABLE WHENEVER THEY GET HERE
WHENEVER THEY FEEL LIKE IT OR CAN GET A RIDE OR ROLL OUT OF BED
GOOD LUCK
COME BACK SOON

Purple Scorpion and Shining Star you can kiss my Ironman ass.
P.S.  This is why I shouldn't keep writing a blog.  Political correctness is not my strongpoint.

IRONMAN RACE REPORT PART 3

26.2 miles.  Lots of people run marathons.  Lots of people do NOT run marathons after swimming 2.4 miles and biking 112.  This was my thought as I ran out of transition.  And I did run...My legs usually feel good for awhile right after biking.  I headed out of town and the feeling good part lasted for a whole two miles.  UH OH.  It's going to be a long night.  My legs weren't the problem.  It was my stomach.  I had a cramp on the right side of my abdomen that simply would not go away.  It was hot too.  I still had my arm coolers on and dumped water on them every aid station in that first loop.  I also had a cooling towel that functions the same way as the arm coolers.  The towel was wrapped around my neck and tucked into my shirt so I looked like I was wearing an ascot.  Very trendy...except I was a sweaty, sticky, smelly mess....but damn I looked good!!!  My stomach cramp allowed me to run maybe a half mile at a time before becoming unbearable and having to walk.  This forced me to adopt a strategy of running all downhills and as much flat as I could tolerate and power walking anything that remotely looked like an incline.  When I was running I could hold around a 9:45-10:00 min/mi.  When I walked I made sure it was below a 15 min/mi. The aid stations on the out & back section of River Road were great.  One had a redneck theme and my second favorite sign of the race..."If you think a girl is out of your league because she bowls on a different night...you might be a redneck."  These volunteers were dressed in hats, mullets and missing teeth.  Another was Christmas themed complete with Santa  Claus and an elf and Christmas music.  The aid stations were stocked with water, Perform, Coke, chicken broth, gu, chomps, bonk breaker bars, pretzels, oranges and grapes.  Nothing on that list appealed to me.  I tried something different each time to settle my stomach but nothing was helping.  I can honestly say there wasn't a lot of running going on by anyone that loop and even less the second time around.  About a mile after the turnaround I saw Kerry.  Again it was such a mood booster to see her and know she was ok and I also knew it wouldn't be long before she caught me and we could chat.  Around Mile 11 as I was powerwalking up the hill back into town Kerry came up behind me and kept me company to the top of the hill then she took off like the Kenyan-wannabe that she is on the run.  Since it is a two loop course the spectators here have no idea what loop you are on so I got quite a few "Way to go..almost there..you are going to be an Ironman"  Umm NO.  I have 15 miles to go not 2.  I headed up Mirror Lake drive and was excited to know my family was waiting for me.  I first saw Cindy, Deb, Patty and Bonnie and then passed by the family.  I handed out high 5's, gave Tracie my sunglasses and arm coolers as the sun was starting to set and headed to the turnaround.  Right before it was special needs run where I stopped and put on my second life-saving purchase...calf compression sleeves.  All of the down hill running and powerwalking was killing my shins.  These things felt wonderful.

I also grabbed a ziploc baggie that had 7 notes in it.  I had asked my family and Quinn to write something down they wished they could say to me during the race.  I stuffed it down my shirt and hit the turnaround and headed back down Mirror Lake Drive past the family again.  Here I stopped dead right in front of them and said "I just want you all to know this is really hard".  But I said it with a smile because I was still having fun.

Note the red ascot and compression sleeves.  Nice

At the bottom of the hill I had to make the dreaded left turn to start the 2nd loop of the run while some lucky people were going right into the Oval to finish.  I resumed my run downhill strategy and noticed my stomach pain was gone.  It was replaced however by lightheadedness.  Great I was thinking.  I can walk the last damn 13 miles and finish but what happens if I pass out.  UGH.  I drank and drank and drank at every aid station and forced myself to eat although I had no interest in anything there.  YUK. My new run strategy was run 20 steps, walk 20 steps.  This worked better and sometimes I could even get up to 50 steps before I thought I would pass out.  And so it went run, powerwalk, pray I don't take a header, run powerwalk, Thank God I am not the person I just went by puking or passed out or crying on the side of the road, run, powerwalk.  At Mile 17 I read the first of my notes from my family and they really gave me something to look forward to and lasted until Mile 24.  It was all good then though.  My feet were KILLING me, I was exhausted, dehydrated, tired and lightheaded but I was 2.2 miles from becoming an Ironman.  As I walked up that bigass hill into town the crowds got heavier and heavier and louder and louder.  For 2.2 miles I heard "Hey 847 you are going to be an Ironman", "Hey Deanne you're almost there, you are going to be an Ironman tonight".  I couldn't stop smiling.  I looked at all of them said thank you and yes... yes I am going to be an Ironman.  I was running/walking around the same pace as a girl named Katie for around 1.5 miles.  She had about 3 or 4 people from her tri team running alongside her telling the crowds to cheer for Katie.  At one point one of them asked my name and I told her.  She then proceeded to run ahead of us yelling at the spectators to cheer for Deanne and Katie.  It was pretty cool.  As I turned onto Mirror Lake one last time I saw Deb, Cindy, Bonnie and Patty again which was awesome.  I knew my family wouldn't be there because they would be at the finish.  I saw Kerry one more time as she headed to the Oval and told her "Go be an Ironman and I will see you at the finish!!!"  Soon it was my turn and as I made the right turn onto Main Street to the Oval I stopped running for a few seconds.  I had two reasons.  1.  Katie was right in front of me and I wanted some separation between us and 2.  I wanted to savor the moment.  I was about to enter the Olympic Oval which was rocking with thousands of spectators and run a quarter way around it to cross the finish line and become an Ironman.  I can not put into words the feeling as I rounded that corner and saw my entire family in their green shirts and then the finish line.  Because I had lost my ability to do math a few hours prior I thought I was looking at around 15hrs 15 min.  When I looked up and saw 14:54:27 I starting fist pumping like the Jersey Shore cast.  Holy crap how did that happen.  And then I heard the words I had dreamed about for months...."Deanne Hobba from Salem, MA you ARE an IRONMAN!!!!!!!!!!!  The finish line catcher put her arm around me and asked if I was ok.  "I think" I said.  And this is how the rest of the conversation went. I can't be bothered with punctuation so follow the conversation.  We are going to walk over there and someone will give you a bottle of water. OK.  Now they are going to take your timing chip off your ankle. OK. Now they are going to give you a finishers shirt, hat, and medal. OK.  Now you are going to go over there and get your picture taken.  OK. Are sure you are ok?  Yep I am fine.  So off I went and found my family, friends, and Kerry for lots of hugs and pictures.

WE ARE IRONMEN

BEST SUPPORT TEAM EVER

BEST FRIEND AND IRONSHERPA

Shortly after these pictures I didn't feel so hot.  I was very lightheaded and my hands were getting tingly.  I didn't want to pass out and freak my family out so I went back in the athlete area and sat in a chair.  A volunteer asked if I needed anything.  She brought me chocolate milk, water and pizza.  Chocolate milk not a good idea.  Couldn't tolerate that.  I drank the water and slowly ate a piece of pizza and after about 15-20 mins I felt better so I went to find the family again.  We sat and talked about the day and celebrated my accomplishment.

They all look so attentive

Thanks to my awesome Ironsherpa Quinn I didn't have to worry about getting my bike or bags.  She had done it earlier.  What a lifesaver that was.  So the final numbers

SWIM  1:34:46
TRANSITION 1 15:29
BIKE 7:30:40
TRANSITION 2 9:28
RUN 5:24:04
TOTAL 14:54:27

There are a few more blogs to write and wrap up the experience so stay tuned but after that my blogging days are over.  My everyday life just isn't entertaining enough to keep this going.

IRONMAN RACE REPORT PART 2

112 very long very hot miles.  Having ridden the course in training camp was invaluable.  I knew exactly what to expect but that didn't make this easy.  I made a purchase a few days before the race that really saved me on the bike.  Arm coolers.

I put these on in transition and when I got hot during the ride I would squirt water on them and they would immediately cool my body temperature.  My bike computer said it was 74 at the start of the bike and 94 at the finish.  Not sure if it really got that hot but it was definitely in the 80's somewhere.  As I headed out of Lake Placid my HR was sky high from being so pumped up about my swim so I settled down and took it easy.  I navigated the never-ending hill out of town and settled in for the long haul.  The course itself was a graveyard of launched water bottles and nutrition.  I could have opened my own store with all the gu and power bars lying on the road.  It also made for a bit of an obstacle course out there.  I hit the downhill to Keene and let loose.  In training camp I topped out at 33 MPH here.  On race day I hit 38 MPH and yes I was scared shitless but it was fun.  Around Mile 36 I stopped to use the bathroom and fix my right sock.  I was getting a horrible hot spot on that foot that was almost unbearable.  Then began the 20 mile climb back into town.  This part of the course is so brutal and we were riding smack into a strong head wind.  If you watched my splits you can see the difference this made.  I averaged 18.29 MPH the first 30 miles and 12.71 the next 26.  You do have to take into account the stop which probably took around 5 mins as I waited in line but still...those 26 miles hurt.  There were so many signs out on the road and stuff written on the road that made me laugh.  Just like Kerry my favorite one on the bike was "If Ironman was easy it would be called your Mom".  Going up Papa Bear hill was great as there were tons of spectators in the road running alongside you screaming for you.  There were also two dudes in cheerleading outfits and this guy.

It also helped to know I would be headed down Mirror Lake Drive in a few minutes and would see my family.  I could see their green shirts a mile away and gave a big wave and smile as I went by because you know what...I was having fun!!!

Hands down best cheering squad EVER

I looped into town behind the oval and headed out for round two.  As expected everything was just harder.  As I approached the bottom of the hill in Keene I saw Kerry ahead of me.  After riding all those miles with her I can spot her easily.  It was such a boost to catch up to her and have a little chance to compare notes and make sure we were each doing okay.  We hung together for a bit and then I pulled away.  I stopped again to fix my right sock as my foot was burning like crazy.  I never had this problem in training and I was a little worried that I had already developed a blister that would haunt me on the run.  Before I knew it it was time to climb back into town again.  OMG this was tough.  I was hot and tired and the head wind was just as brutal.  There was a lot of carnage on this stretch of the course.  I saw no less than a dozen people off their bikes throwing up over the guardrails.  I also saw two or three lying flat out on the ground waiting for the ambulance.  As I passed all these people it was a reality check.  No matter how bad I felt...and I did...it could be much worse.  I had to stop for a third time to ease the pain in my foot but then got going and was back on Mirror Lake Drive again to see my family and friends.  This time as I looped around to the Oval it was time to get off the bike.  After 7 hrs and 30 mins my 112 mile IM bike was done.  My actual ride time was 7:23 so between the 3 stops I only wasted 7 minutes.  I think I consumed around 6 bottles of Perform, several bottles of water, 6 gus, 1 pack of gu chomps and two bonk breaker bars on the bike.  As I hit the dismount line I unclipped and was very happy that my legs cooperated and did not crumble beneath me.  A volunteer took my bike and I shuffled into transition to get my run gear bag.  Before going in the tent I hit the bathroom and then into the tent.  Once again a volunteer sat me down and dumped my stuff out and asked what I needed.  Again I said I have a list.  Helmet off, shirt off, running shirt on, bike shoes off, tri shorts off, underwear and compression shorts on, eat, drink, advil, body glide feet, socks on, shoes on, sunglasses on, gum in.  I can't run without gum!!!  The volunteer packed all my stuff back in my bag and turned me around the right way as I attempted to run the wrong way out of the tent.  Hey...I was hot and tired....what can I say.  This transition took 9.5 minutes but again I don't care.  I didn't want to forget anything.  As I crossed under the Run Out arch the clock said I was now 9 hrs and 40 minutes into my Ironman day.  At that point I could still do math so I knew I had 7 hrs and 20 mins to run a marathon.  I could pretty much walk the majority of it if I had to.  OK legs I know you have gone 114.4 miles already but we have 26.2 more to go and they are going to be the hardest and hurt the most so let's get this party started.

Me and my ass headed out on the marathon

Stay tuned for the run details